‘Art Decade’ – David Bowie
Do I really want to die?
What do I want?
I want someone to be here now; to love me. To tell me they care.
I need everybody: Flash, Jenny, Alison. They care. I think.
I’m sorry I couldn’t ring, Flash!
Hopefully I’ll be in Castleford tomorrow, at my Gran’s. Hopefully. She hasn’t sent the train fayre yet, so I’ll have to go on my own money. Oh well. And Betty’ll go on about how much the Winterfoods don’t really care about me and all that SHAIGHT…
NEARLY … THE END … ONE GULP AWAY!
What of my report?
Help me! I don’t wanna leave…
‘A New Career in A New Town’ – David Bowie
I think it’s about 4pm…
FUCK OFF, BERWIN!!!
I’m feeling calmer, now. I’m sorry about my previous outbursts, but I’m getting immensely tense and worried about my future…
Well, I should be leaving for Yorkshire at about 2.25pm or 3.25pm tomorrow afternoon, and my dearest diary shall be accompanying me.
By the way, last time I knew, Flash was back with Dodo. What a madcap, quirky couple they are, eh, fellows?
‘Warszawa’ – David Bowie
‘Before the war, what was there?’
‘Only ash and small flowers. And a man. What was his name? Ritcherd. Yes, Ritcherd – but spelt funny! Why did you want to know?’
‘Yes. I used to be curious, also. Oh, the sweet smell of the ash, and the flowers in bloom could tear the soul from a man. My heart will always skip a beat at the thought. Texture like fine powder… And the rabbits would trail over the hills, playing their spring games. How I wish you’d been there. Alas…’
Sometimes I even scare myself…
Don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay!
‘Always Crashing in the Same Car’ – David Bowie
I am in my stripy pyjamas, flat-haired and dishevelled with soft stubble. My eyes are dark and I have spots on the bridge of my nose. My cheeks are hollow and my end is coming soon!
SORRY ABOUT THIS!!!
I popped down to Alison’s for a while tonite. About five minutes, on the way to pick up Queenie (Freddie’s mum). She says she had a good Christmas. I lent her some more tapes. She was quite eager to hear about Flash’s love life developments with Dodo and Manda…
She mentioned something about the fact that she had been thinking about inviting me to go for a drink with her and Sara on Christmas Eve, but she didn’t because she didn’t want to sound as though she was madly in love with me…
Why is she so wonderful? So nice? I could kiss her to death if it wasn’t for my usually tangled web of a life.
I’ve got to write to her…
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NEXT TIME: ‘Yorkshire…’