The Winterfood Diaries

The Winterfood Diaries

Saturday, 18 October 1986

Ready When You Are, Bob

‘We Are Ninja’ – Frank Chickens

I awoke today, absolutely looking forward to seeing Alison.

First of all, I went to Wisbech, and then Lucille (Freddie’s sister) brought me back to their house where I am staying.

After tea and another brief glimpse of Doctor Who: The Trial of a Time Lord (Part Seven)

…I finally went to Alison’s.

  When I arrived, I gave her the poster Flash and I made of me for The Situation’s Ritcherd For President ’86 ‘campaign’ last autumn…

…and a card that told her no matter where I am I will be thinking of her; which is absolutely true!

We chatted about things for a while and eventually went to the pub (The Last of England), where we drank vodka Martinis, and chatted about the events that had brought us together.  I told her that I wouldn’t be able to see her tomorrow, as I am going home at 11.30am, and she was rather upset by this, as was I.  I really want to see her tomorrow, but still, that’s life!

‘Catch My Fall’ – Billy Idol

Later, we headed back to her house, where we chatted some more, while she chewed and sucked my fingers, nibbling and gently biting at them like a little puppy.  She was eating Polos and put one of the ones she’d been sucking into my mouth, which felt oddly amazing.  Finally, I asked where ‘Bob’ was. 

‘He’s here,’ she said.

I didn’t really know how to react because it was time for me to go back, so we cuddled.  Alison said she didn’t want me to go and I told her I didn’t either.  But as I was about to leave, the inevitable happened.  We kissed.  It was a good kiss.  And I suppose, in a hypothetical world, that seals the contract.  We are now going out with each other.  And I am very happy.

As I left, we kissed again at the door.  Now we’re both looking forward to Monday.

As I walked in the darkness back to Freddie’s mum’s house, I felt like the happiest man alive.


From a shimmering web-like hyperdimensional plane emerges the buffed and polished love heart of our union, emblazoned with the legend ‘Ritcherd 4 Alison’; the golden juices of that heart, punctured by love’s arrow, spill across time and space, showering all with joy and happiness…  

[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’section below) / ‘Berwin Groomstool’ is an iteration of the Situation character‘William Whicker’ and falls under joint copyright of Elton Townend Jones and Waen Shepherd / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction – cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 1 July 2012 and is intended to cover this and all posts on that precede it]

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